un-written rules/codes/hints? first timer questions.


First Post
Oct 13, 2021
thank you all for taking a moment to read this, we currently returned from our first trip to TTR we wouldnt say we are in the "life " but enjoy the party we are completely comfortable with watching/ being watched but have yet to expand ourselves,

during our trip with met couples that were also first timers but not in the life either they just dont mind nudity/ sexual infused games etc but we all couldnt figure out was maybe some of the unwritten rules of TTR or kinda coming from people in the lifestyle
here are a few questions we are unsure of with already having a second trip planned for may we kinda wanted a better unstanding

1, door left a crack open ( understanding this could be hard to read as we leave our door cracked for friends coming to grab us for dinner) but maybe later in the night like when dinner is over?
2, the PSST door tag? we were kinda shy and nervous about stoping to read it completely
3. door closed but maybe a bathsuit bttm or top on the door handle? ( we seen this a few times on our walk back n fourth but laughed bc our newly friends did that to remind us of the door when grabbing them for dinner so we teased them saying it was a full invite)

any kinda more codes/ un written tell tale signs that we should look for or maybe not do ourselves without avoiding a awkward conv of that kinda of help for the hotel would be awesome

we overheard a few convs in the hot tub and just kinda laughed but minus being with our friends noboday really approached us unless i was in the bathroom at bash then they would try to talk to the wife, even those whom msg her on tempt social didnt end up saying hi, not sure if becuase we are younger maybe changed minds or bc we did find another couple, couples that were our age they didnt want to approach thinking we would turn them away. but we just love the party reguardless of age.

we do understand more of the basic codes about the life in general like the pinapples, black rings etc.. we are just more curious about the hidden in plain site codes that us newbies dont know about lol

thanks you all for any replies, unconfirmed at the moment but may 21-28 2022 is our planned second trip wanting to make more great friends like the first trip


Well-Known Member
May 20, 2018
You might be putting too much thought into looking for clues and hints when the best approach is simply to introduce yourselves to people you don’t know. Start conversations with people and if you seem to be hitting it off, bring up things you’re interested in and ask what they’re interested in. Ask if they’re in the Lifestyle. Rather than looking at doors, jewelry and pineapples, just talk to people!


Oct 12, 2013
Yep just meet and talk to people dont be shy to ask questions looking for clues and nic nacs you will be waiting a long time i find most that wear a visual clue dont mean anything as they are just doing it to think they will fit in/ be cool as a fad … We have been swingers for 25 plus years have seen that too many times..
Swingers will find each other but it requires conversation,,,

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